Dr. Hunt’s favorite quote was”The past is just that the past”. Another one of his favorite quotes was “Know who owns the problem”. I’m reminded of both of these quotes today and this one too by Steven Covey “Any time you wrap your emotional life around the weaknesses of another person, you empower those weaknesses to control you.”
Yes indeed, all these rang true for me today. It’s difficult to see who owns the problem when you’re overly responsible and/or are afflicted with the disease to please. But some people deserve to stay in your past and don’t deserve your attention. Furthermore, we must recognize when it is in our best interest to do as Tupac so eloquently says….
Life is too short to endure needless stress because of other people and the drama they inflict in your life. Sometimes life brings a situation to a screeching halt either by our choice or by the other person’s choice. Although it may hurt, it’s all good. Struggle to get, struggle to keep. Life has a lot of struggles inherently built in them.
However, struggling with people shouldn’t be one of them especially not in romantic relationships and close friendships. Those people should be counted as your inner sacred circle and should be a place of rest and restoration. But not every one has the capacity to be counted as one who should belong in your inner circle because all it does is bring needless drama and struggles to your door step.
In situations like that it’s best to just not give it your attention neither publicly or privately. Nothing has the power except the power you give it. When people don’t appreciate you, your friendship, and/or your love, don’t waste your time and attention struggling to gain favor in their eyes and/or trying to make it work or resolve differences with them.
Especially when the person is a repeat offender. Instead, hurt that one last time and pick yourself up and dust yourself off and go live your life to the fullest knowing that you will hurt that one last time and no more with that person. One monkey don’t stop no show. You can’t change people …only they can do that for yourself. Neither can we control other people but we can control our thoughts and we can control how we feel.
So when faced with needless struggles with other people whether it be within your family, romantic relationship, work relationships, friendships, etc. decide to let the past be the past, never stress, and realize it’s not worth your attention. People don’t define who we are and certainly not our conflicts and/or struggles with them.
We define who we are and we get to control our own thoughts and emotions. Like I used to tell my son when he was in elementary school when the kids would pick on him, ostracize him, and treat him like the odd man out, “flock to the people who think well of you and want to be with you and seek you out and don’t give those other kids your time and/or attention.”
Likewise in life, people who don’t know how to treat you the way you deserve to be treated…leave them in the past, never stress, and recognize they are not worth your attention. I like the way Susan Elliott said it best “Reject the Rejector”. Go live your best life and leave the past in the past. Use today to launch rockets of desires to become who you might have been.
Life is too short so live well while you can…there are easier people to love …invest your attention in attracting them into your life and double life’s pleasure with them rather than waste your time doubling life’s pain with a situation/person you cannot change.
In hindsight, you will thank that rascal friend because they did you a huge favor for the part they played in your life. Therefore, it’s a waste of energy to be mad and/or harbor any negative emotion towards them because they choose to live life by different rules. And, we all do. Instead go find others who play by the same rules that you do and are easier for you to get along with.
Life is meant to be fun, exciting, thrilling, adventurous, wondrous, miraculous, abundant, joyful, peaceful, and good. The past is the past make a decision today to live a life marked by miracles and to give your undivided attention to living beyond the limits!