Are You Living Life on Your Terms?

FB Cover April 2015

It’s so easy in life to think that we are living life on our terms but are we?  The quote says ‘you’.  But in my mind several things can be substituted for the word you.  For instance ‘this job’, ‘my finances’, ‘my living arrangements’, ‘traffic’, etc.

Any other words anything that we look for to make us happy outside of ourselves we are in essence enslaving ourselves.  Because we are giving our power away to things outside of our control.  Whenever we look to any person, place, or thing and say “if this would change, then I can be happy”, then in essence we have become a slave to that external factor waiting for an emancipation that more than likely will never happen.

To change ourselves seems to be the last thing we would like to do.  I guess to a certain degree, we don’t want to accept the level of unhappiness that we feel in our lives.  It so much easier to blame situation, people, and/or things.  But the truth of the matter is as long as we choose to blame, we render ourselves powerless to change.

Les Brown says “Wants show up in conversation and expectations show up in behavior.”  If we’re feeling any level of dissatisfaction in our lives, it’s a wake up call that we need to change so that we can be free and live life fully based on our own terms. And, to do that we must expect to be happy and change our thoughts and behaviors.

How do we do that?

Step 1 – TAKE RESPONSIBILITY: Admit where I am is the sum total of my choices. I created or co-created everything that I see in my life.

Step 2 – FORGIVE YOURSELF: If you’re really disappointed about where your sum total of your choices has landed you,  it’s okay. Forgive yourself and make the decision to make a U-turn heading in a new direction.  It’s never to late to be what you might have been.

Step 3 – DECIDE WHAT YOU WANT:  Have the courage to decide what you want. Not what you think you should want.  Not what others say you should want.  But decide for you once and for all what exactly it is that you desire.

Step 4 – CHANGE YOUR THINKING: As Albert Einstein so eloquently said…‘We can not solve our problems with the same level of thinking that created them’.  In other words you can’t think the same way and expect different results.  Behavior is driven by our beliefs. And beliefs are simply thoughts we have thought repeatedly over a period of time.

Research, take classes, get coaching, go to counseling, read books, listen to audios, etc.  Do whatever it takes to cultivate the mindset that is needed to create the change needed to live life fully on your terms.

Step 5 – LOVE, LOVE, LOVE: I cannot add anything more to Oliver Wendell Holme’s words which are – “Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness”.  Learn to have the courage to genuinely and truly love for as often as you can and for as long as you can.  Extend love and kindness to everyone.

Life is too short to be anything but happy.  Decide today to live life fully based on your own terms and stop waiting to be happy.  Choose to change yourself and be happy. Cheers! ♥

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